megaphoresMetaphors and Similes never looked so good

User profile for hoggy

Total submissions: 29
Daily Wins: 7
Editors Picks: 3
Megaphails: 0
Average score: 71%


All submissions by hoggy

Made in Chelsea is more cringeworthy than Jersey shore bred with Only way is Essex, on steroids. With a steaming dog turd in the middleMegaAwful
This Icelandic volcano is causing more disruption than a Megan Fox nipple slipMegaAwful
Yesterday's Rapture was rubbish. But when my prediction comes next week, you'll all be sorry!DW MegaAwful
That BBQ smells so good it's like a sign of things to come when the Rapture comes in 5 hours...DW MegaAwful
After losing to Jedward at Eurovision, Blue must be feeling bluer than the Blue Man GroupDW MegaAwful
My youth is disappearing so fast it won't be long till im moaning about 'the youth of today' and telling children its the best time of their lives. Now wheres the tax return MegaAwful
I understand the AV voting system about as much as i understand the League Table on Megaphores. Its changes everyday!DW MegaAwful
I understand the AV voting system about as much as i understand why Labour bother to run for government again.MegaAwful
You call this torture? You might as well give in. Now Nyan cat for 6 hours straight. Thats a real mans torture!MegaAwful
You call this torture? You might as well grease up my nipples for the electrodes, and we can call it fun for the whole family!MegaAwful
I care as much about you as I do about a cold beer on a hot day. Perfect in moderation, but overdo it and your in the shit the next dayDW MegaAwful
If I were a spy I'd be as subtle as James Bond, as he slips the Rohitnol into the unsuspecting womans drink.DW MegaAwful
When I showed up to that Bar Mitzvah I felt about as welcome as a bad case of roidsMegaAwful
When I showed up to that Bar Mitzvah I felt about as welcome as when i turned up at veterans day as Hitler, complete with finger 'tashMegaAwful
Can you turn down the light? It's brighter than the freshly spilt blood of the rabbit i just caught in my headlightsMegaAwful
Nothing gets me out of bed quicker than When the mistake from the night before tries to slip a digit up my arseMegaAwful
You and me baby ain't nothing but mammals so let's do it like they do it on Animal Farm. Ill get the pony.MegaAwful
The Royal Wedding would be infinitely more interesting if Snookie from Jersey Shore was a guest speaker, Charlie Sheen is doing crack off a hookers back and Harry is a Nazi againMegaAwful
The Royal Wedding would be infinitely more interesting if anybody who was cool enough actually gave a toss. Seriously. Its like watching rape porn. You dont want to, but cant helMegaAwful
If I don't stop drinking whisky my liver will look like im staging a re-enactment of the rectum of 1 guy 1 cup.EP MegaAwful
Nicholas Cage's film career is like a combination of Lady Gaga and a Laurel and Hardy sketch. Terrible, mad, and yet slightly amusing.MegaAwful
Life through Charlie Sheen's eyes must be loonier than Space Jam, part deux.DW MegaAwful
My phone is so outdated it doesnt even have Snake!EP MegaAwful
That model is so hot I would happily chance snapping her twig like bodyMegaAwful
No way could you do that. You've got more chance of using that expired condom you keep in your wallet 'just incase'EP MegaAwful
Justin Bieber is more annoying than a slow aids related deathMegaAwful
When the probe was inserted I felt as if it was just right.MegaAwful
Someone took a dump in my shoe and it smells like a gnome and a tramp cross bred and the mutant offspring was the culprit.MegaAwful
That drunken text was a worse idea than going swimming with Michael Barrymore.MegaAwful
 
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