I’m about as happy as blind poof in a hotdog factory

I’m about as happy as Pig in shit

I’m about as happy as a termite in a lumberyard

I’m about as happy as a beatific bundle of blissfulness.

I’m about as happy as a nun in a cucumber patch.

I’m about as happy as a crack addict

Jennifer Aniston has more ex boyfriends than elton john, dale winton and george michael put together

Jennifer Aniston has more ex boyfriends than John Mayer has sold records...

Jennifer Aniston has more ex boyfriends than she has terrible movies on her resume

Jennifer Aniston has more ex boyfriends than A queen bee