I’m about as happy as blind poof in a hotdog factory

I’m about as happy as a nun in a cucumber patch.

I’m about as happy as a beatific bundle of blissfulness.

I’m about as happy as a dog with two dicks.

I’m about as happy as Kid in a candy store

I’m about as happy as Pig in shit

This inner ear infection is making me clumsier than a tiger on charlie sheen blood in china shop

This inner ear infection is making me clumsier than a 1 legged giraffe trying to stand on marbles

This inner ear infection is making me clumsier than a crack whore with a broken heel

This inner ear infection is making me clumsier than a drunk 2-legged elephant

This inner ear infection is making me clumsier than a one armed zombie with no brain left

This inner ear infection is making me clumsier than Cait Sith