I’m about as happy as blind poof in a hotdog factory

I’m about as happy as Pig in shit

I’m about as happy as a termite in a lumberyard

I’m about as happy as a beatific bundle of blissfulness.

I’m about as happy as a nun in a cucumber patch.

I’m about as happy as a crack addict

I visited the very depths of hell and it was like a standard friday night with all the whips, torture & gang rapings.. only a bit warmer..

I visited the very depths of hell and it was like Asda on pension day.

I visited the very depths of hell and it was like Being a Yankee in Louisiana.

I visited the very depths of hell and it was like an Amy Winehouse gig with Rebecca Black as the support act

I visited the very depths of hell and it was like standing in an infinitely long queue behind retards who take forever at an ATM machine

I visited the very depths of hell and it was like Day 1 of my shift in the ryanair hangar