Top 10 by Gadzooks

That drunken text was a worse idea than doing a 500ft bungee jump with a 600ft bungee
Gadzooks | 23/01/2011 | Permalink | E | MegaScore: 163
A spider just landed on my face and I screamed like I'd been suplexed through a cattle grid
Gadzooks | 09/04/2011 | Permalink | E | MegaScore: 150
Where did you meet her? She looks like my old boxing gloves - sweaty and leathery, with fist-sized opening just waiting to be filled
Gadzooks | 05/04/2011 | Permalink | E | MegaScore: 148
4
Being a 51 year old virgin is leaving me more frustrated than being beaten at pinball by a deaf, dumb and blind kid
Gadzooks | 09/02/2011 | Permalink | MegaScore: 125
5
When the probe was inserted I felt as if the medical for being a choir boy was surprisingly rigorous
Gadzooks | 07/02/2011 | Permalink | MegaScore: 114
6
Just been for a run and now I'm sweatier than Darth Vader in an S&M store
Gadzooks | 01/04/2011 | Permalink | MegaScore: 113
7
You call this torture? You might as well cover me in chocolate and throw me to the lesbians
Gadzooks | 27/04/2011 | Permalink | E | MegaScore: 112
8
If I was on Mastermind I would look dumber than a Redneck retaking primary school for the 18th time
Gadzooks | 27/01/2011 | Permalink | MegaScore: 98
9
Been listening to Chris Moyles for 30 hours straight and now I'm feeling more neurotic than a squirrel that's been partying with Charlie Sheen
Gadzooks | 17/03/2011 | Permalink | MegaScore: 98
10
Just been stung by a wasp and now my face has swollen up so bad it looks like I've been used as a blunt weapon to beat someone to death
Gadzooks | 02/04/2011 | Permalink | MegaScore: 94